The end of a relationship is an incredibly difficult and painful time in your life. We understand that. The only thing that even comes close is the death of a loved one and, for most people, divorce is worse. Remember that this will hopefully be the hardest thing you have to face in your life. Be kind to yourself. Understand that you may not be functioning at the top of your game. Or, you may feel like you are doing fine and then find yourself unexpectedly weeping in the grocery store cereal aisle. That is normal and it is important to allow yourself to deal with your grief, anger and sadness.
Most importantly, please remember two things. First, this too shall pass. And second, we can help you. We can comfort you, talk you off the ledge and fight for you. I love this kind of work because of the incredible sense of accomplishment I get in seeing the difference between our first meeting with our clients and our last. Our goal is to have you walk out of our office with your head held high, excited about and ready for the next step in your life.
If you want to talk to someone who understands what you are going through, please call me. If you are ready to think about some of the more practical aspects of the divorce, please see below.
You are going to have a lot of practical questions about the divorce process when you first meet with an attorney. Obviously, I cannot answer all of those questions here. You should make an appointment to meet with me or another qualified divorce attorney to discuss your specific situation in detail. However, here are a couple of important things that should happen at the outset:
- • As you begin this process, you will need to gather your information and records, including all financial documents. This includes figuring out what your assets and debts are, as well as what your monthly expenses are. This may take some time. We recommend that you open a document on your computer, jot down all of the things you can think of, and leave it open for a couple of days, so you can add things as you think of them, such as that little retirement account from your job you left eight years ago, or paying for your kids’ haircuts. We will sit down with you and go through all of your documents and help you figure all of this out. It may sound daunting, but we can do it together.
• Figure out exactly what you want to gain from the divorce. This is an important question, and has two parts.
- First, you need to figure out what you need the court to grant, in addition to the end of your marriage, because any claim you do not raise in the divorce complaint is likely then waived. So, if your spouse has damaged your property, or if you want the Judge to legally change your last name, for example, those should be raised in the initial complaint.
- Second, you need to take the time to figure out what your goals are, what you really need to happen in order to move forward with your life. Figuring this out in advance help enormously in getting you there. What are your financial needs? Do you want to continue to live in your home? What custody and visitation outcome do you want? We can help you talk through all of this and then fight for the outcome that is best for you.
Call me to discuss divorce or separation, issues related to child custody, alimony and support at (201) 664-8855